Moving

So I did it. I made the move to wordpress. You can now find me at http://ordinarylifeinmommyland.wordpress.com.

4 Months!

Miss Kara is 4 months old today. I know all babies grow fast, but seriously, how can she already be 4 months old?!!  I just want her to stay a baby forever. I'm only kind of kidding. 

At 4 months, Kara is still the best baby. She has been great this whole time. By far my easiest baby, and I did not think the boys were difficult. She is just sweet, happy, content. We can take her anywhere, and she does great. 

She goes to St. Jude with me and Ethan every week. She is very popular there, and there is usually a crowd of nurses to argue over who gets to hold her while I take care of Ethan. :) She doesn't know any difference. I do think it will be fun taking her in a few more months when she is really mobile. I think she is going to learn a lot of compassion and many other lessons from being there, and I plan to keep taking her. As a side note, I did take Nathaniel with me up until Kara was born. He was good, and he liked going. But there came a point when I could tell he didn't like being there anymore. He would get really upset about Ethan crying, and try his best to protect his brother. He started acting out, and I think it was his way of dealing with all emotions surrounding what we were going through. He is much happier now having a play day, and a break from the constant reminder that Ethan is sick. 

Back to Kara. :) She weighs 15 lbs, 12 oz, and is 24 1/2 inches long. She has came a long ways from the 6 lbs that she started out at! Dr. Seigel just went on and on about how great she is. She did not fuss at all during her check up. She is just a happy girl! God knew was He was doing when He blessed us with her. 

She is still having only breastmilk for food. We could start solids anytime in the next couple of months, but I am in no rush. Honestly, breastfeeding is the lazy way for me. I don't like worrying about making and washing bottles. We just go with it. I don't know exactly how often she eats, but she has spread out feedings, and things are definitely much easier. She has been a great nurser the whole time though. 

She can roll from stomach to back. I think it's pretty impressive since she is rarely in the floor. It's too dangerous with brothers running around! Ha! I usually try to give her some floor time in the evenings. 

She is grabbing and holding toys. It's so sweet to see how much she has developed this skill in just the past few weeks. She has one crinkle book that she just loves. I am working on going through the attic and bringing out all the toys she will need when she starts sitting. 

She sleeps great at night, and still sleeps quite a bit during the day. I usually don't wake her much because I can get more done with the boys while she is sleeping. :) She does stay up really late at night! I think it's genetic though, and she gets it from her dad. Plus it's her alone time with us. 

Kara loves her big brothers!! They can make her smile anytime. Nathaniel is constantly asking to hold her. Ethan is her protector. He always tells me if Nathaniel is getting too close. He always makes sure that we are bringing her with us, and that no one is taking her away. He was not happy about me taking her to the doctor yesterday. I'm so thankful they love her so much! 

I think that is just about everything that is going on with her. I wish she would stop growing, but I am looking forward to all the exciting changes coming up. I love my little girl!

Monday ramblings

Stefan has been teaching some night classes at work, and that leaves me and the kiddos with some really long days. I have a tendency to dread these days. They can be really long! But I'm learning to just enjoy the time I have with these babies. You never know when something might change your whole world in an instant, and it's really important to make the best of each day. I have by no means perfected this, but today was really great.

We got out of the house this morning and made a quick Target run. The boys are really at an age where going to the store isn't too bad. They both walk with me pretty well. Kara is still young enough where she stays in a carrier on my chest. I'm sure we are a sight to see, but it works! We always get tons of comments on how busy life must be with three. Some are genuinely nice, but some people just look at me like I'm crazy. I have definitely noticed a difference in the way people notice 3 kids versus 2. Why is this??

We came and put away groceries and I cleaned the kitchen. I really did not spend my whole day cleaning. It is so tempting to do that! I'm learning that a clean house really is not important. Our house looks like children live here, and that is how it should look. Oh how I struggle with this though! I know that I still spend too much time worrying about how my house is never clean. Some day I will be able to clean it again, and then I will be wishing that I had sweet young ones to be around messing it up!

 We spent some quality time on the couch. 

I love the red bird photobomb. :)

 This afternoon we baked some cookies. Nathaniel did some school work. Kara and Ethan napped. It was time for baths and bed before I knew it.

 Kara snuggled with mommy. 

Now they are all sleeping, and I need to clean and be ready to do it all again tomorrow. :-)

The Weekend

We had a great weekend. The sewing bug hit me, and I made some super cute things for Kara. I love sewing for her, and I plan on doing it for years to come!

Here is her new top!

Sweet baby girl.

And another top and bloomers. :-)

Kara did this for the first time this weekend. I can't believe she is old enough! She has her 4 month appointment on Tuesday.

Saturday evening I took all three kids to El Mezcal by myself while Stefan did yard work. I'm getting brave. Ha!! They were really good. 

Ethan has super puffy cheeks from his last round of steroids. He is still a cutie!

Sunday was family time. We should be back in church next week if Ethan's counts are good. I so can't wait!

Ethan's Story, the beginning

I wanted to do a post on how we found out about Ethan having leukemia. I have been needing to write this for a long time. I want to be able to look back and remember this time, and be able to tell Ethan all about it. Thankfully, he will not remember it all himself.

I honestly had no idea that Ethan was sick. He is such a fighter! I know he must have felt so awful, but he did not let us know that in any way. Of course, thinking back there were a few signs that he had, but I did not put them together until after his diagnosis.

Here goes... We had a really busy October as a family. I was 16 weeks pregnant at the beginning of the month, and was just over my morning sickness. I remember we had a zoo trip, visited a couple pumpkin patches, had birthday parties for Nathaniel, and went to another birthday party. I think we even visited our family in Arkansas twice during this month which is rare. We also did fun things like bake pumpkin pie and have friends over. I will never forget that because it was like the calm perfection before the storm.

The last weekend in October, on a Friday evening I noticed some bruising on Ethan's arms. They really stuck out to me because they were large, and I had no idea where they came from. I was pretty sure Nathaniel was not hurting him, and we had not visited any playgrounds recently. I took a couple pictures and sent them to my sister-in-law. She definitely thought I should have him checked out. Stefan also agreed that it would not hurt to at least let the doctor see him. Still, I found myself going back and forth on whether this warranted a doctors appointment. I don't know what it is about me, but I never want to see a doctor unless I know for sure something is wrong. Thankfully, God knows more than me, and he put things in place for us to see Ethan's pediatrician the following Monday. If I'm truthful, I know that I doubted my decision to take him up until we were in the doctors office. worst mom ever....

 Here are the bruises that I noticed Friday evening.

After noticing the bruises, I made up my mind not to worry the whole weekend. I did google things like what normal bruising for children was. I was doing my best to stay away from googling actual conditions like leukemia. And still, Ethan was not sick so I did not feel like he met the description for that. His bruises definitely were not considered normal though. They were larger than a quarter, and had a raised center. We went on with our weekend. I remember going to Priddy Farms Saturday morning. Ethan was clingy, but that was kind of normal for him. After we left there, I got a text from SIL that a friends daughter was in the hospital just diagnosed with leukemia. I was so burdened over that, and spent the rest of the weekend praying over them. We went to church on Sunday morning, baked a pie that afternoon, and had our friends over to eat it that afternoon. I was showing everyone his bruises. I guess I really did know something was up.

This was their last picture before everything changed in an instant.

Fast forward to Monday. I  managed to get Ethan an appointment for 4 that afternoon. Nathaniel was home with us and we did his first day of homeschool. More on that later. By the time I got Ethan in to see the doctor, I knew something was wrong. When we stripped him, he had new bruises covering his whole body. Tiny blue bruises everywhere. We discussed what was going on, and they pricked his finger for a little blood test. I remember sitting in the room forever and texting a few people that we did not have the results back yet. Then a nurse came back and said that the test did not work and they needed to try it again. Ethan wasn't so happy with it that time. It was not too long after that that Dr. Seigel came in and explained everything to me. He showed me the results of both tests and how they ran it twice and it came back the same both times. A white blood count of 66,000 which is extremely high, and I remember his platelet count was 7. His hemoglobin was really low too. Basically, this was classic leukemia presentation. Dr. Seigel did such a great job of breaking this news to me. We love him, and he will be our pediatrician forever. He explained that we just needed to stay put. He was making phone calls, and he would know soon whether we would go to LeBohner or St. Jude. Thankfully, he knew some people and was able to get us right into St. Jude. This does not happen often, and we know it was all God's doing. We left the doctors office with instructions to pack for a week stay there, and get to St. Jude as fast as we could. We had a very sick little boy!

Let me just say that I now know what the grace of God really means now. I do not remember being scared for Ethan during this time. I do remember being seriously scared about the fact that I was 20 weeks pregnant, and how in the world were we going to handle that. I guess because I had Ethan right there with me, and he still seemed ok at the time. And, I had absolutely no idea what we had ahead of us with cancer treatment. Knowing what I know now, if I heard those words again, I would be scared to death! God gave me the most amazing calm right then though, and I think Ethan and everyone around me needed it.

As we left Dr. Seigel's office I had already told Stefan and my SIL. Stefan left work immediately to meet me at home. I called my good friend to pick up Nathaniel and keep him overnight. I called my mom and told her, and I called my sweet mentor to tell her what was going on. I will just say that everyone else was not as calm as I was. I don't even know how I could be calm besides God's grace over me. I do remember thinking that I could not handle everyone crying as soon as they heard the news, and that I hoped they would be more together before they met us at St. Jude. Honestly, they had every reason to cry and be upset. Ethan and our whole family were about to start the battle of our lives.

This ended up being much longer than I expected, so I will continue with our week at St. Jude in the next post.

Wow

There really are no words to describe everything that has happened with our family in the past 8 months. I think most of you that read this blog already know that Ethan was diagnosed with leukemia last October. Woah, my sweet baby boy had cancer, and we didn't even know he was sick! He was a fighter the whole time. On top of that, I was 20 weeks pregnant with our baby girl. It has been a wild journey, but God has been so faithful to us! So I wanted to get back here and start sharing all of the ways we were blessed during this time, and the rest of Ethan's 2 years of treatment. I'm hoping to play catch up and start from the beginning, and hopefully add in some of the other things we do each day as well.

Long time, no post

So, it has been forever since I have even wanted to touch this blog. Honestly, the weeks have went by lately without me even touching the actual computer. Why? Well, life is super busy, and I have been super busy making another life. That's right, sweet baby #3 is on the way! We are super excited! I'm 18 weeks now, and we have our big ultrasound at the end of this month. I can barely make up my mind on finding out the sex of the baby or not. Anyways, I spent the first 16 weeks sicker than I have ever been. We are talking completely useless, I could barely stand up without puking. Sure, it's worth it now, but it was a miserable time no doubt. Major props to my husband for stepping and taking care of just about everything around the house! Anyways, just thought I would pop in real quick and share the news. I may even try to get back here a little more often. :)

Walking Buddy

This sweet little boy begged to walk with me this evening. He stayed close to me the whole time, and asked a question about everything we saw. We had a great time!

I sure do love my baby boy!

Brothers

Nathaniel and Ethan have been so attached lately. I love how summer has done that for them. I know I have said it before, but Ethan(and me) are going to miss Nathaniel so much when school starts back.

They do still fight over toys occasionally, or maybe a lot depending on the day, but I have noticed them really sticking up for each other. Interestingly enough Ethan has become super protective of Nathaniel.

If another child touches Nathaniel(Thul's) toys, Ethan is sure to remind them that they are Thul's.

If Nathaniel needs juice, then Ethan needs juice too, or cookies, or anything.

They literally do everything together! Today, Nathaniel came and told me he was going to potty, so Ethan came up right behind him and said he needed to potty too. It cracked me up!

I'm sure there are so many examples of things they do together, and I just wanted to document a few during this sweet time of their lives.

A few pictures to illustrate. :)

This one was just cute, and it was past 8am!

New Office Update

Our new, tiny office is almost finished, and I love how it has turned out!

It looks a bit simple right now, but it is functional.  I still need to add some fabric covered cork boards, and something on the left side to hold papers. The computer is not hooked up yet, but we have plans to move an outlet from a wall next to the closet. No worries, we are leaving that the professional aka our friend/neighbor from down the street.

I stole these bins from my sewing room, and they provide tons of storage. I made the labels with my cricut machine, and laminated them. I needed a good excuse to use the cricut!

Here is a close up of the labels.

This artwork was also in my sewing room. It was a free printable that I found on a blog a couple years ago. I had to print it because it was my favorite verse. Sorry, I don't have the link for that blog anymore.

My sister-in-law made this weekly memo board for me. It was meant for my yellow and gray kitchen, but that plan hasn't happened yet. :) I don't think I love it in here yet, but it will definitely be useful.

Our family planner sits easily accessible on the desk along with some art supplies for the boys. Oh, and don't worry about those scissors there. There is a lock on the closet door, so the boys can't just get in by themselves. Just wanted to make sure everyone knows they are safe. Ha!

A final before and after comparison.

Wow! Seeing it side by side amazes me!

This project was so quick. It really just took me a couple days in real time. Now I am inspired to fix up a few more rooms in our house!

New Spaces

I have been working on a little house project this weekend...a soon to be closet-office, or cloffice. I'm not quite ready to share the final reveal yet, but I will share the scary before picture. Don't judge, everybody has one! :)

This closet was pretty much useless. It did store our coats well, but it's position in the house, (by the front door) just meant that we didn't use it much during the winter. We always use our back door, and I have hooks for our coats there. So, I decided to make it much more useful as an office, which we did not have before. It will store all our office supplies and craft supplies for the boys.

Here it is all cleaned out and ready to be made useful.

I can't wait to get it all finished up and ready to use. I have zero budget for this project, so I am having a  good time shopping around the house for baskets and things. There is just something fun about creating a new space with things I already had in the house. Updated pictures coming soon!

I hope everyone has a great week!

Mother of Boys

What does it mean to be a mother of boys?

Today it meant that playing at Chik Fil A involved jumping from the steps. And that Nathaniel tried to run up the stairs and hide when I said it was time to go. No worries, this mama read his mind and caught him before he got up there. Ha!

It also meant that the living room was full of legos and cars. And that those magnets on the door will never stay organized.

It meant that the boys would try to drive their cars on the ground through the Kroger parking lot, and that they would run around wild inside of the store.

And it meant that Ethan would throw this Mater at a moving car, and manage to bounce it off the tire of said car. Yeesh!

It means that life will always be an adventure!

Show Us Your Life - Bathrooms!

Welcome from Kelly's Korner. She has been doing a home tour for the past several weeks. It has been a great way to get some inspiration!


I managed to snap a few photos of our guest bathroom, and the boy's bathroom today. It would be too much work to get the master bath viewable. Ha!

Here is our half bath. I love this bathroom because it is so convenient. It is an awkward space below the stairs, but I'm glad it's a bathroom and not a closet. Since we have two stories, it has been invaluable for me and the boys. lol

It is still a work in progress. We need to add the chair rail, and paint the trim, but it has came a long ways from where it started!

It comes complete with little boy cars. Lately they have been playing in the sink with them. I'm considering it a learning activity. :)

Just for fun, here are a couple of before pictures.

Not quite our style...


Here is the boy's bathroom upstairs. It was a plain beige color, and I painted it this green. I really love it, and think it's a great kids color. It's not overly decorated, but I will continue to update it as they get older.

Close ups of the artwork. We bought these pieces at Mardels in Arkansas for Nathaniel's nursery. I thought it would look nice in here now that he is older.

The vanity area is separate from the shower area. Perfect for when they get a little older. Shower curtain is from Target.

They have a good sized closet that adds tons of storage.

And finally, more cars. They are drying from the previous night's bath. And yes, we have way too many cars!

Hope you enjoyed a little peek into our home!

Mommy Guilt

It’s time to be honest, transparent, and real on this blog. So here goes. I spend too much time overthinking/ worrying about whether I’m doing my best as a mother or not. I mean, I think I’m a pretty good mother. My boys are well cared for, loved on, and they are pretty happy boys. BUT, I’m always going back and forth on whether I spend enough time with them, or if I am teaching them enough, do I read and sing to them enough...all that good stuff. I guess it boils down to mommy guilt, and there is just no time for that in this house! 

Here is where my biggest dilemma lies, is it ok to do anything around the house besides play with the boys? I’m not talking about watching the tv or surfing the net, honestly that is not where I struggle. I do struggle with my time spent cleaning. There is always something to be picked up, or vacuumed, or dusted. So then I begin to worry, do I put cleaning the house ahead of them? If I really think about it, I don’t think I do. Especially since summer has started, I have been able to keep things pretty clean with a short amount of time spent in the mornings. Then the rest of the day we play outside, go out for different activities, meet friends, or even watch an occasional movie. 

Where should the line be drawn though? Is it wrong to do anything besides entertain the  boys the entire time they are awake? I really don’t think so. It is just not sustainable for me to do all of my cleaning after they are in bed. If I chose that route, then I would be neglecting my husband, and that would be wrong too. He wants me to be available to relax and watch tv with him at night, and I enjoy that too. I know life is about finding the balance, and I think part of that balance may just include cleaning some while the boys play. 

The boys have been really good this summer! I mean, they drive me crazy, they throw fits, they whine when they don’t get their way, but I have seen their relationship grow so much these past few weeks. They are fighting less, and playing better together. They really love each other, and are truly attached at the hip. Ethan literally does everything he sees Nathaniel do. 

So, why do I feel guilty for quickly cleaning the kitchen during these times when they are playing perfectly together. I feel crazy for even thinking it, but this is how the cycle goes. I feel like I’m neglecting them if I do anything else around the house, even though they couldn't care less if I’m with them right then or not. Then sometimes when I’m trying to get us all out of the house for something fun, they don’t care to go, but I’m forcing it because when we are out I’m certainly not neglecting them. It’s tiring! Trying to do the best for your children is tiring all the time! 

I will admit that some days I struggle with this more than others. And I’m a million times better with it than I used to be. It’s just so easy to slip back into those bad thinking habits some times. Here are the solutions that have helped me:

1. Stop "stinkin thinkin"! Yep, I said it! If everyone is happy, then I don’t need to worry about it. I need to trust myself, and my own conscience. I need to trust myself to know that if I need to change something, God will certainly let me know, and I will change. I have a close relationship with Him, and he convicts me of other things, and He will on this issue too. 
2. Stay away from things that will make me feel like less of a mother. We all know there is so much out there to bombard us as mothers. There is plenty to tell us how many activities we need to do, and that our children should be reading at age 1, and I could go on and on. The truth is that each family is different, and what each child needs is different. I don’t need to feel bad about having a different type of schedule and doing different things than everybody else. 

My favorite go-to verse to help me keep my thoughts in order.

“Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and God of peace will be with you.”

 Philippians 4:8-9

Anyways, I may have rambled way too much. I just felt the need for some honesty here, and to let others know that it's ok to relax and do what is best for your family. Has anyone else struggled with this? What did you find helped you?

Simple 4th

We chose to keep things pretty low key this year. I guess we tend to do that every year. With the 4th falling on a Wednesday, we couldn’t justify driving to see our families for just one day. So we just enjoyed a day with daddy being home. 

The boys played so great together all day. I was seriously amazed! They both love to play cars and legos. Nathaniel spent most of the day building monster trucks, and Ethan followed right behind. There have been some rough times this summer with them fighting, but I know Ethan is going to miss Nathaniel so much once school starts back. They really have been joined at the hip!

After having Mexican for dinner (real American, huh?), we took the boys out for ice cream. They thoroughly enjoyed it. :)

Ethan eats ice cream like no little boy I have seen before. He takes the tiniest licks, and it takes him forever to finish. This is why I never let him get a cone. Bad mommy, I know. Ha!

He actually requested this picture. Lately his favorite thing is to find different poses for pictures.

Ethan is definitely our comedian. He is always doing something to make us laugh!


Hope you had a great 4th of July too!

Officially Summer

 We officially brought the pool out for the summer. It was wild! 

 Non stop fun for these 3!

 I managed to get some cool action shots. (I promise Nathaniel isn't actually that tan.)

 Love this one!

Reilly never fails at getting a good laugh. :)

So thankful for warm weather, and wonderful friends.

Oh, and I am so excited to say that we are having a fence built within the next couple weeks! After three years of me being a nervous wreck while we play outside, it is about time. I can't wait for lots of worry free adventures just outside our door.